Aed jokes
Q. What's Jeffery Dahmer's favorite song?
A. "Pieces of You."
What do we want?!
A cure for Tourette's!!
When do we want it?!
Cunt!!!
I had a friend who got shot in the head.
Guess you could say he was...
Blown Away!
What happens when a strawberry gets run over crossing the street? Traffic jam.
A Scotsman at the hairdresser: "How much is a haircut?"
"Six pounds."
"And shaving?"
"Three pounds."
"Good, then shave my head."
What kind of motorcycle do women ride? A menstrual cycle.
My girlfriend called me a pedophile.
And I said, "That's a big word for a 5-year-old!"
What did the priest say when he walked into an elementary school?
Let us prey.
If a baby dies in the womb, is it considered suicide?
What was Kurt Cobain's biggest flaw?
He had a short temper and lost his head over everything.
How do you know if an Asian is an orphan?
If their grade was only an A.
What's the difference between a joke and two dicks?
Women can't take a joke!
Why did John rape his mother? Because he wanted a brother to play Mario Kart with.
What has two wings and a halo?
A Chinese telephone. (Wing, wing, halo.)
What did the woman say when I told a rape joke?
"I don't get it."
What’s the easiest way to dig a hole to China?
Through my arm.
How do you make the world’s greatest Harlem Shake?
Throw a flashbang into a room full of epileptics.
What sits at the bottom of the sea and twitches?
A nervous wreck.
What’s the difference between a firefighter and Snoop Dogg?
Snoop Dogg inhaled less smoke during 9/11.
Wanna see a joke I found? *shows mirror*