Aed jokes
I'll stop with the horrible puns if you can say a good joke.
There was a guy called Manners, one called Poo, and one called Shut Up.
One day, Manners was on his way to pick up Poo from school. A police officer stopped Shut Up and said:
Police: "What’s you name?"
Shut Up: "Shut Up."
Police: "Where's your manners?!"
Shut Up: "Picking up Poo."
Why is the most popular food at a baseball stadium pancakes? Because everybody likes a good batter!
I got a new job at a trampoline park the other day. If I’m being honest, it’s got its ups and downs.
Why can’t you tell a funny joke to a wheelchair kid? Because he just rolls with the joke.
Reasons
What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.
Someone asked me what the worst mistake you could make while being at work was, and I replied, "Being a doctor and mixing up the oral and rectal thermometers."
What do you get when you cross a belt and a watch?
A waist of time.
I had a joke about pizza, it's just too cheesy.
Why didn't the newest Star Wars movie start with the classic scrawl?
Because it was a Rogue One!
What is a fat boy's favorite karate move?
A pork chop.
What do you call a laughing motorcycle?
A Yamahahahaha!
Both man and woman have balls, but they like to play with the ball of each other because a person always loves what they don't have. 😁
I was always told as a kid that I have to pick between being a programmer and an English teacher.
They said: you can't be a "pro-grammer nazi."
What's the difference between Batman and a Black man???
Batman can go out at night without Robin.
What do you call two homeless people throwing rocks at each other?
A pillow fight.
Why won't an atheist convert to the religion of Islam? Because being on the sex offender list is the only requirement to be a Muslim according to the Arabic religion of Islam.
That awkward moment when a fat kid says, “That’s how I roll.”
What's a little white dot on a priest's dick? A baby tooth.
A woman is lying in bed after making love to her lover. After a moment, she starts to roll over, and in the process, she realizes that the spent condom is still inside her.
Worried, she wakes up her lover. She asks, “What should we do about this?” To which he replies: “Who was it?”