Aed jokes
Hey God, what are you making?
Just a wooden stick that lights on fire.
Sounds like a match made in heaven.
What can a gay man not be, but a heterosexual female that is a whore can be if a heterosexual male gives her enough money? 💸
cock teaser
Google is a woman because it doesn’t let you finish a sentence before it makes suggestions.
What do lesbians do when they have a problem? They finger it out.
A feather and a depressed boy fell at the same time, which one hits the ground first?
The feather, because the rope stopped the child.
So a man asked another man, "What's your name?"
He says, "What's it to ya?"
So the guy asked again, "And he says what's it to ya?"
Come to find out his name was What's It To Ya.
Why is Peter Pan always flying? He Neverlands!
Where do sheep go to get their hair cut? The baa-baa shop.
Why did Adele cross the road? To sing, “Hello from the other side!”
How do trees access the internet? They log in.
Did you get them? Me neither. I mean, it is worst jokes ever. I'm kidding, I actually do understand them.
I got 99 problems but a chin ain't one.
A Biologist, a Chemist, and a Statistician are out hunting.
The biologist shoots at a deer and misses five feet to the left.
The chemist shoots at the same deer and misses five feet to the right.
The statistician shouts, "We got him!"
A guy tells his pal, "My wife is expecting. We're going to the clinic to see if it's a girl or a boy."
"Congrats, man. What are you gonna name it if it's a boy?"
"We're going with Trevor."
"Ok, what if it's a girl?"
"Then we'll have an abortion."
What’s the difference between air and a six year old?
Air has resistance.
What happens when a Jewish guy walks into a wall with a full erection?
He breaks his nose.
A lady weightlifter goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, I have a confession." The doctor asks, "What is that?" She replies, "I've been using steroids and....I think I've grown a penis." The doctor looks at her and asks, "Anabolic?" There's an awkward silence then she replies, "No, just a penis."
Q: Why do Norwegian ships have bar codes on them?
A: So when they come into port they can Scan-Da-Navy-In!
I have a new joke.
My life. Wait... jokes are supposed to have meaning.
You see a kid on the side of the street crying, so you go up to them and say, "Where are your parents?" The kid says, "What are parents?"
My dad was on a hotdog with ketchup.
How many gay guys can you fit on a bar stool? Four, just flip it over.
Murder: Wanna play a game?
Me: Ok (pulls out Xbox controller)
A pair of souls were floating up to heaven when they passed a pair of eagles.
"Ah, eagles," said the souls. The eagles were too polite to say anything.