Aed jokes
Are you a cheese 🧀 from Denmark? Because your "guta."
Why doesn't the orphan have a nationality?
He doesn't have a motherland.
Did you hear about the new Oasis restaurant?
Every time you order soup, you got a roll with it.
Exercise?
I thought you said "extra fries!"
-A minion (you may now laugh).
Sally had 69 boobs, which was 222 many, 69,222. So she went to the doctor on 51st street, 69,222,51, who gave her pills. She took them 8 times a day, and now she is boobless.
I have a Twin Towers model in my room.
It got infested with jumping spiders.
What type of doctor is Doctor Pepper?
A fizzician.
"Rock-a-bye baby on the treetop, When the wind blows, the baby will drop. Then the baby will lay on the ground, Not moving a muscle, not making a sound."
God loved you so much that He gave you one face and started clearing off a place for another.
Why did orphans play Poppy Playtime?
To get a family.
A guy ate your hairline because it reminded him of a McDonald's fry!
There's this smart way to sneak a calculator into school. I've heard of it. You take the calculator, put it in a gun magazine, put the magazine in the gun, and bring the gun to school!
Q: What are women better than men at doing?
A: Winning arguments.
Q: What are men better than women at doing?
A: Winning swimming titles.
My dad died in 9/11, and that was the second worst thing that happened to me with a plane, next to Soul Plane.
What do you call a turkey when it is scared?
A chicken.
I'm playing a game of HANGMAN. Is there an 'S' or a 'C'?
MIKE PEN__E??
How does a tree access the internet?
By logging in and branching out!
I'm afraid for my gay calendar. Its days are numbered!
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Hey girl, are you my boss? 'Cause you just gave me a raise.
My mom told me, "You son of a b!tch." I told her, "I may be a son of a b!ch but at least I am not the bitch." She hated me forever.