Aed jokes
I pushed an orphan in a wheelchair into a fire and yelled, "Hot wheels!"
I saw a website for orphans. It was a bit confusing because I could not find the homepage.
What has more brains than a student in a school shooting? The wall behind them.
Why did the farmer eat a fork?
'Cause he's a dumbass.
Q: What season can an orphan see their family tree?
A: Fall.
If you don't get it, in the fall trees have no leaves, there [are] just empty branches, like an orphan's tree.
Why is Mrs. Grapes 🍇 a good mother?
Because she loves raisin' kids.
How do you get a baby into a small bowl?
A blender.
How do you get it out? Tostito chips.
What’s the difference between an onion and a photo of a dead relative? Nothing, they both make you cry when you look at it.
If you humped a whale, it would humpback.
What happened to the man who made too many bad jokes? He served out a cruel and unusual PUNishment.
What is so similar about a concrete block and a garden?
They both make vegetables.
If a cat hits you with her tail, is it considered being pussy whipped?
A mother and her 7 year old child are walking in the grocery store. The young boy then screams to a random woman “you're an ugly bitch.”
The mother grabs her son and says, “I’m so sorry, I must have told him a thousand of times to not judge people on how they look."
How do you turn a duck into a soul singer?
Put him in the microwave until his bill Withers.
What is a female gamer's favorite part of the controller?
The joystick.
Why is James depressed?........ because he's a bitch.
The reason Stephen sounds like a computer is because he ate his USB.
So my friend's birthday was coming up, so I got him a new box to live in.
It was not a hijack, it was Stephen Hawking.
My last relationship ended because my ex-girlfriend accused me of being a rapist. I'm not upset. To be honest, I didn't like her anyway. She kept telling me I never listen, or something like that.