Aed jokes
My Grandma, like any other, got an APPLE IPHONE 12, but as we all know, we get dumb, and so we buy a phone. My grandma did not even know how to use it. She even said, "How do I go on Google?" I told her, "YOU CAN'T!" My grandma was, like, "Yeah right, how do I do it?"
Comment down below, does your grandma do this?
The eyelash and the lipstick got into a fight. Soon they will make up.
Your hair line is curved like a moving train.
Santa was in my social studies book. He was a redcoat.
I have a friend who has no arms, her name is Suzy. I always tell her this one knock knock joke, "Knock Knock!" "Who's there?" Not Suzy.
Q: What's the difference between an egg and me?
A: An egg gets laid.
A Japanese man goes to the dentist. After being there for a while, the dentist asks, "How often do you floss your teeth?"
The Jap said, "After every meal." When they finish up, the dentist turns to him and says, "You need to floss your eyes more. I can still see them."
Q: Why is America bad at chess?
A: Because they already lost two towers.
What’s the difference between a fetus and a jar of pickles?
The pickles aren’t as tasty in a jar.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I have no balls, neither will you. 🔪🔪
What is an example of poor management? A prostitute getting pregnant.
Why were the Twin Towers mad?
They ordered a pepperoni pizza, but only got plane.
This guy looked down the aisle and asked, "Hey, are those kids all yours?" And I replied: "No, I work for a condom company, and these kids are just all of my complaints."
What's the difference between a bridge and a burrito?
I can't jump off a burrito.
Q: What do you call a black prostitute in space?
A: The Blackhole.
A married woman gets hit by a truck, and the cops tell her husband:
Cop: "Sir, it looks like your wife's been hit by a truck."
Man: "I know, but she has a great personality."
Did you hear about the shark that ate a key shop?
I think it got lockjaw after that.
What is a physicist's favorite food?
Fission chips.
How to get a girl in three steps:
Step 1: grab a pillow.
Step 2: grab a blanket.
Step 3: keep dreaming.
I think it’s dumb that people say a woman belongs in the kitchen.
How else is the rest of the house going to get cleaned?