Aed jokes
What goes black, white, black, white, down a hill?
A fat nun.
What is the one thing wrong with Asian pet stores?...
There is always a kitchen in the back.
What did the condom say when he came out of a gay guy's asshole?
He said, "Fuck this shit!"
Why did a minister who is a Christian nationalist and a bisexual man give anonymous blowjobs to physically handicapped gay men under the handicapped stalls inside the men's restrooms at a rest area?
He wanted to eat footlong hotdogs for lunch at the rest area, but he wanted a sample first (taster).
Holy shit there's so many yo mama jokes. Here's mine: Yo mama so skinny she used a cheerio as a hula hoop.
Yo mama so fat that she made a plane unstable and crashed it into the Twin Towers.
Yo mama so old that she has Jesus's autograph.
Yo mama so ugly that not even makeup can save her.
Yo mama so dumb that she thought Rocket League was a competition between kids in wheelchairs.
Why did Mary fall off the swings?
She got hit by a refrigerator.
Q: What's the difference between an egg and me?
A: An egg gets laid.
What do you call it if your mom is a guy and your dad is a woman?
Transparent.
What is the worst thing you can find out about a woman on a first date?
She claims to have been raped. Then, you know to get as far away from her as possible because she's probably a feminazi bitch.
What do you call a kid having a seizure on a dance floor? An improvement.
One day, a cop pulls a van over, and when he walks up to the window, he sees ten penguins in the back.
The cop asks the man, “Are those your penguins?”
The man says, “Yes, they are my pets.”
The cop replies to the man, “You need to take them to the zoo right now.”
So the man agrees and drives off. The next day, the cop pulls over the same van, and he walks up to the window and sees the ten penguins all wearing sunglasses.
The cop says to the man, “I thought I told you to take those penguins to the zoo.”
The man says, “I did! Today, we are going to the beach!”
What do you call a Roman with hair in his teeth?
A "glad-he-ate-her".
What's the difference between a dead baby in a dumpster and a treasure chest? It's a surprise when you find the treasure.
What do you call a chicken looking at a bowl of salad?
A chicken sees a salad (chicken Caesar salad).
What's the difference between a feminist and a pencil?
One of them has a POINT:)
What is a dead kid's favorite anime? Bleach.
Q: How do Chinese people name their kids?
A: They throw pots and pans down the stairs and see what noises they make.
Sally threw herself a birthday party, and only one person showed up. Who is it?
The grim reaper.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? A lick-a-lot-of-puss!
The Trump family are flying from New York to DC when Donald looks down on the cities below.
Trump: "I think I’ll throw a $1000 bill out the window and make some American happy."
Melania: "Oh honey, why not throw ten $100 bills out the window and make ten Americans happy?"
Ivanka: "Even better daddy, throw 100 ten dollar bills out the window and make 100 people happy."
Pilot: "Why don’t you all jump out the window and make the whole country happy?"