Aed jokes
I was trying to tell some people here to stop, but then I found out that the S was covered in blood from me assaulting someone.
You look like your mom and your dad had a child.
One random YouTube comment in 2018: "Soon, a virus will come to Earth."
A year later: "Pahahahahah that comment is fake lmaoooo ahahahha!"
Another year later: "Time to die a painful death."
Another year later: "God has come with the cure!"
Life's a bitch, and then you die. I now see what they mean.
My friend said, "Let's have a sleepover."
Little did I know it was just at prison.
Man: *behind the women* She's so ugly!
Woman: My back is not a voicemail, unless you're a coward and can only say it behind my back to my face.
*Chatting with a stranger on the internet*
Me: Hi, how are you?
A stranger: I'm fine, hbu?
Me: I'm good. 🤷♂️
What's the difference between a terrorist training camp and an orphanage?
I don't know, I just fly the drone.
It was my cousin's birthday and my mom said what should we get her? I said a rope.
Q. What do you call a biracial kid in a vegetative state?
A. A mixed vegetable.
Q. What do you call a group of emos?
A. Suicide Squad.
How's George Floyd doing these days? Being drug-free for a year, he must be feeling pretty swell.
What do you call a mug? A mug dummy.
What do you call someone in a wheelchair with a gun? A rxd.
What do you call a too round egg?
A prEGGnant egg.
So two dudes were at a bar and out of nowhere they hear, "Oi mate, talk to me like that again, I'm gonna shove this stick so far up your ass you'll look like a Popsicle."
What is a snake's favorite drug?
Adder-all.
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
A family portrait........
You might say I'm mean but what are they gonna do..... tell their parents?
Wait..........
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Isabell?
Isabell really needs to go on a bicycle.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Covid.
Covid who?
The thing that killed half a billion people!