Aed jokes
Yo mama got a daughter in a relationship, and I don't have time for you, ASAP, daughter, daughter, or your mother, or your call, or your choice of choice.
What is a carrot's favorite shop?
The wheelchair store.
Why is Megan a down?
Because her last name is Downy.
What do you say to a woman who is completely beaten up on her face, full of bruises, and has a broken jaw?
"Will you listen now?!??"
Friend: I got bit.
Other friend: By what?
Friend: A dog.
Other friend: (Runs away and the next day you know everyone is wearing a mask and the friend gets expelled because of rabies.)
Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a Glock aimed at you.
Bro, you can't be talking. You built like Barney the dinosaur. Barney is a dinosaur with dinosaur sensation.
A Jew and a Jew walk into a bar. The goy says, "What do you want?" The first Jew says, "Give it alcohol." The second Jew says, "My son ran away and became Christian." Another Jew pipes in, he says, "My son too!" The bartender turns around and says, "You're not going to believe this..."
Joke time!
Now, Heaven or Hell?
Heaven: we got clouds.
Hell: we got a frickin' private yacht!
So, gender equality is the idea that a woman can do anything a man can, right? That they should be treated the same? So, therefore, if she swings on me, I could punch her into the Twin Towers because of gender equality. I love gender equality.
What's the difference between you and a Barbie? There is no difference. Both of your faces are fake.
Messi isn't as rich as Ronaldo. He cannot afford a Lamborghini.
Today I feel Qatari. Today I feel Arab. Today I feel African. Today I feel gay. Today I feel disabled. Today I feel a migrant worker.
How does a rapper clean his house?
With a LIL' SCRUB.
Why are autistic kids a stupid, brainless, special freak?
Fam, you weaker than a polar bear!
Kid: Your mom!
Orphan: I don't have a mom.
What do you call a Panera Bread marking a test?
A Panera grade.
Why do emo kids wear hoodies all the time?
Because they are hiding stitches.
Say what you want about Paul Walker, but he was a smart guy.
You can tell by the quantity of brain matter on his dashboard.