Aed jokes
A genealogist looks at the family tree.
A gynecologist looks up the family bush.
I aced my poker test...
My teacher asked me to reflect on my work, so I got a mirror...
A caffeinated vampire goes to sleep in a coffin...
Do you get my puns? No, because you can't seem to get a grasp on how bad they are...
What is a woman doing with an empty sheet?
Reading her rights!
A teacher is teaching a class algebra. Timmy, you've worked out it is AK, but what is 59 minus 12? Timmy shakes his head, not knowing. The teacher asks, "How about AK 49 minus 2?" Timmy replies with um... The teacher becomes frustrated and yells, "What comes after AK, Timmy!?" The white kid at the back stands, shouts 47, and pulls the trigger.
Have you ever had a bad sausage? It's the wurst.
What’s a zebra? A few sizes bigger than an A.
What's the best part of a vegetable? The wheelchair.
What’s a German’s favorite drink? Orange Jews. Hundred percent concentrated.
Why did the old man win in a fight? Because he was stressed.
What do you call a girl furry?
A pussy cat.
A girl asked her mom, "Why is my name Walmart?"
Her dad replied and said, "Because that’s where you were made."
When you send your girl a dick pic, but she says it's small, so you text back and say:
"Enjoy the little things."
A bully says, "I get 10x more girls than you" to a gay kid.
Then the gay kid says, "10 X 0 is still 0."
Imagine a white van. Now imagine a white guy in the driver seat with a sombrero on and his arm out the window, and on the side of the van it says "Free Candy." But there's blood all over the van and a dead clown in the back.
Been getting a lot of paper cuts on my fingers lately, I guess it's a sign I should go lower.
I have a Twin Towers model in my room.
It got infested with jumping spiders.
He couldn’t stand it anymore with his sister because he is in a wheelchair.
What problems might a blind child run into?
A wall.
So the other day my black friend and I were working on a group project. He was so slow so I whipped him to make him faster.
How are corpses like pools?
Once you get in, it's only cold for like a minute.