Aed jokes

What do you call a redhead in a fridge?

I'm pretty sure her name was Kelly.

Why did the penis go fly?

Because a girl sucked it too hard, it went flying away.

What's a baby orphan's favorite joke?

"When am I gonna see my parents?"

Lmao.

Yo mama so fat when she stepped on a monster truck she turned it into a lowrider.

Thanks for the birthday wishes. It's been an odd one this year, as some of you know, my father suddenly passed away on my birthday last year, and anyone who knew the old man knew he had a sledgehammer wit!

Good on ya dad, ya definitely got the last laugh!

I told people your mom is also known as "MBD" because you're a mega baby dispenser.

Woahhhhhhh, we’re halfway theeeere! WOAHHHHHHH OHHHH, Squidward on a chaIIIir!

Bestie Hannah heard that bestie Iz had a migraine! What did she do? She said, "My grains don’t hurt that much, at least not when the animals eat them!"

I will always remember my grandpa's last words after robbing a bank: "Oh, shit! The pigs are catching up!" But the cops did not kill him; he drove full speed off a cliff.

How do you get an orphan sad?

You say you will tell their mom that they have been a baaaaaad boy.

What's the difference between a watermelon and an orphan?

One you cut into 2 with a knife.

And the watermelon you cut into pieces.

Me: Mom, we made a cake.

Bully: Guess what?

Me: What?

Bully: Nobody cares!

Me: Yeah, nobody cares about you!

Have you ever seen that weird ad that pops up at the bottom: sexy Russian babes looking for men older than 30, and they're 18, so is it a reverse pedo? Oh well.

I made this one up myself just now.

Stephen Hawking would be a good pilot because the aircraft would be the first to take off and land in autopilot.

How do Chinese parents name their children?

Dropping a pan down the stairs. Bing, Bong, Dong.

What do people have that orphans don't? A family.

I woke up when I heard a strange noise coming from my kitchen.

I turned on the light, and I saw none other than the exposed flop GHOSTNALDO. He asked me if I had PenalTEA, his favorite drink. I said no and yelled, "There is a big game tomorrow!" and he disappeared.

Knock, knock.

Who's there?

Bum.

Bum who?

Bum holding a pistol!

My sister said that if you go to a random person's door, the sister will all Waze open it.

How do you tell if a chick is too fat to fuck? When you pull her pants, her ass.