Aed jokes
How can Batman defeat the Joker? A: With a handful of sleeping pills.
Did you hear? There's a new fast food restaurant coming: Jacko in the Box.
What do you call a riot full of white people?
An avalanche.
The real reason women are always cold is because they’re not in front of a stove or an oven. So, naturally, when they leave the habitat, they need to have two blankets.
What do you call a Muslim guy in a bathtub?
A bath bomb 💣
My friend's mom once told me that when Trump was elected president, she said to my friend: "Hey look, an orange became president. We got an orange as a president before a girl as president."
What does an orphan call a kidnapping?
A surprise adoption.
What did the mom say to the twins?
"Go crash a plane!"
Why couldn't George Floyd become a Demon Slayer?
Because he couldn't breathe.
Obama has dih.
But the Twin Towers just had a hard landing.
Q: What kind of person has 100% ambition and never gives up if someone gets in their way?
A: A rapist.
What’s the difference between air and a six year old?
Air has resistance.
Take a few steps back like your hairline.
I was reading a book about an immortal cat the other day; it was impossible to put down.
A man walked into a bar and said, "What do you call a cum shot?"
The people running the bar said, "I don't know, nut."
The guy said, "Are you calling me a nut?"
People always call me heartless. That’s not true. I have a heart... it just wasn’t meant for you.
I'm the type to blow up half of my house to kill a spider... and still miss.
I'm not saying you're annoying.
But if a yeast infection were a person, it would be you.
An officer confronts two congressmen.
He informs them, \"I’m looking for a couple of child molesters.\"
The two look at each other, turn to the officer and exclaim, \"Sure! We’ll do it!\"
All right, I know one joke. Um, there's a mollusk, see? And he walks up to a sea...
Well, he doesn't walk up, he swims up.
Well, actually, the mollusk isn't moving, he's in one place.
And then the sea cucumber, well, they... I mixed up.
There was a mollusk and a sea cucumber. None of them were walking, so forget that...
There was this mollusk and he walks up to a sea cucumber. Normally they don't talk, sea cucumbers, but in a joke, everyone talks.
So just then, the sea cucumber looks over to the mollusk and says, "With fronds like these, who needs anemones?"