Aed jokes
What do you call a person that [proudly] knows only one language? A bloody seppo.
What do you call a person that speaks five languages? A Euro waiter.
God, you’re having a good day?
Me: Yes, beats burning in hell.
What do you call two black lads in gold?
A Twix.
Q: I like elephants.
A: Everything else is irrelevant.
Q: I like elephants.
A: Everything else is irrelephant.
What do you call a Muslim bee?
Habibee.
All those people claiming Donald Trump is like Hitler need a reality check.
After all, it's not like Donald Trump could write a book.
Ruin a quote by attributing it to the wrong person.
"Don't cry because it is over. Smile because it happened." -Adolf Hitler, 1945.
What's brown and in a baby's diaper?
Michael Jackson's hand.
There's a new Michael Jackson biopic in the works. There is a possibility that we will know who his love interest was.
What we know so far: Billie Jean is not his lover, and that kid [seen with him] is not his son. We also know that Michael Jackson said that sharing his bed with little boys is "healing" and an act of "sharing the love," so take that as you will.
Well, you know what they say, time flies when you're just a ball of anxiety and stress. :D
Timmy Turner: I wish the Vegan Teacher was a cheeseburger.
Wanda: Ok, Timmy.
Timmy: Cosmo, bring her to me!
Cosmo: Here you go, Timmy.
*Timmy eats Miss Kadie*
Hey kids, guess who started a micronation?
It’s Barney and Trump. They don’t let gays in, but they kill them.
What do you call a very long bowl?
Manute Bowl.
Urban areas are filled with terrorists, feminists, liberals, and murderers. Which one is not like the others? Murderers because they don't pretend to have a cause.
Me: Spanish teacher, why do we need to learn Spanish?
Teacher: Because you might go to Mexico and start a job.
Me: Why would I want to sell drugs?
Boy, your forehead so big, I can make a launchpad on that shit!
I came across a dead body in the woods. I liked it so much I came again.
What can an elevator do that an orphan’s parents can’t?
The elevator can raise a family.
No, it's not just a crotch grab. Jacko was jacking it on stage when he saw a 6-year-old boy in the front row.