Aed jokes
How does a cannibal start a wedding reception?
He toasts the groom.
I pulled a prank on my friend the other day. I painted a portrait of the backrooms blueprints while he was sleeping. Still had some extra space.
If being sexy was a crime, you can call me......... a law-abiding citizen.
Meow meow, I'm a cow and I like cum cum cum.
What do you call Panera bread that has been weathered and eventually gathered and via cementation and pressure, it becomes a layer of different materials and is also one of the most common types of rock in the sea?
Panera Sed!
What's the difference between a low tide and your hairline?
Nothing, they're both receding.
Q: What do you call a shed full of black fellas?
A: Retired Farming Machinery.
If someone is bullying you for being fat, remember, you're the bigger person, a MUCH bigger person.
What's the difference between Woody from Toy Story and a Catholic priest?
One goes limp when a child walks in the room.
A police officer pulls over two Catholic priests. He says he's looking for two child molesters.
The Catholic priests look at each other: "We'll do it!"
What's an astronaut's favorite game? Space-ball!
What do you call a black person in a dark room?
Invisible.
9/11 was a round of Clash of Clans. They knocked down two towers, not three.
My ex's dad died while she was texting me. She said she had a boyfriend, but I told her I had a dad.
I had a cake for my gender reveal party. I cut it, and the inside was yellow...
A Make-A-Wish patient wanted to see Black Panther IRL, so I pulled his plug.
What do you call a bald pig? Technoblade! HAHAHAHAHAHA
Just looking for a cunt...
Oh hello, found one.
Why can't orphans be gay?
They don't have a closet to come out of.
I will make a funny joke if you let me be your boyfriend. I'm 19 and I am Russian.