Aed jokes
Yo mama so fat that she should be worried for her health and go see a doctor.
Two antennas got married on a roof. The ceremony was horrible, but the reception was great!
I saw my sister masturbating with a carrot. I said, "Come on, I was gonna eat that later! Now it's just gonna taste like carrots!"
What do you call a stupid turtle?
Retorted.
Why did Wi-Fi and the computer get married?
Because they had a connection.
How are a woman and a car alike? Put something in them and they'll both start.
I was going to tell you a cow joke...
But it's pasture bed time.
A dyslexic man walks into a bra.
What was the pedophile charged with when he was arrested? A minor offense.
How long does it take to blow up a baby in the microwave?
I don't know, I close my eyes when I masturbate...
22 ants were playing football in a saucer.
One ant said to another one, “We'll have to play better tomorrow. We're playing in the cup!”
Helen Keller fell down a well. She screamed and screamed until she was blue in the hands.
If Stephen Hawking has a heart attack, do you take him to Halfords or A&E?
He told me that he was in a wheelchair, and I asked, "Oh, wheely?"
How can you tell when a cabbage is boiled?
The wheelchair floats to the top.
What's a pedophile's favorite part of a hockey game? Before the first period starts.
When is a door not a door? When it's ajar.
When is a car not a car? When it turns into a driveway. 🥁
My friend told me he had a sister. I asked if she was hot, and he said she was 8. That wasn't my question.
Why has Stephen Hawking stopped playing hide and seek with his wife? Because she keeps using a metal detector.