Metal Detector jokes

Why has Stephen Hawking stopped playing hide and seek with his wife? Because she keeps using a metal detector.

Why did Stephen Hawking and his wife stop playing hide and seek? She kept using a metal detector.

"Hey, hey, Spongebob! Water you doing?" [laughs]

"Just looking for all my coins with my metal detector because beach better have my money!" [laughs]

"How much have you found so far?"

"Y'know what, I'm not really shore!" [laughs]

"Water exists."

Airport security: "What the fuck did you just say?"

Do you know Stephen is dead? He doesn't have a stone. Do you know how to find him? A metal detector.

So, we are in class right, and the teacher has a metal leg. Every year she gets the question of, "Do metal detectors beep every time you walk by them?" She heard this question to the point where she just says yes without hesitation.

Once she had said yes, two kids in the back started laughing.

Teacher: Ok alright, take it a little bit more seriously would you?

Kid: Oh, we're not laughing at that.

Kid_2: We're laughing at cancer.

I was digging in our garden when I found a chest full of gold coins. I was about to run straight home to tell my wife about it, but then I remembered why I was digging in our garden.

Like if you know someone is emo.

What do me and Monster cans have in common? A barcode.

I know I'm valuable, I come with a barcode ;)

If I went to Walmart, I would be able to scan my own wrists because they're barcodes too.