Aed jokes
Who is not hungry in Africa?
A dead person.
What does broccoli and sex have in common?
If you were forced to have it as a kid, you’re gonna hate it as an adult.
How does a rapper fix stuff?
With a RAP-AIR!
What do you call a rapper who LOVES winter sports?
Ice Cube.
Me: What has two legs and bleeds?
Friend: Um, women? Obviously?
Me: Actually, half a dog. So you're still right.
One day, little Johnny woke up to get a drink of water. He passed by his parents' bedroom and noticed sheets bouncing. He asked his dad what he was doing. He said, "Playing cards." Little Johnny said, "Who is your partner?" Dad said, "Your mom." On his way up, he passed by his sister's room and noticed sheets bouncing around and asked what she’s doing. She said, "Playing cards with my boyfriend, Paul." The next day, Dad came to ask Johnny a question. The father noticed Johnny was still in bed and asked him what he was doing. He saw the sheet bouncing and asked Johnny what he was doing. He said, "Playing cards." His dad asked him who his partner was. Little Johnny said, "You don’t need a partner if you have a good hand."
Scientists say a banana a day is great for the colon.
But you gotta eat it!
What if Game of Thrones and Harry Potter antagonism had a child?
Coldemort!
How many dyslexics does it take to change a lightbulb?
Steven.
What’s a rapper’s favorite part of the house?
The rhyme cellar.
What’s a booty’s favorite game?
Hide and cheek.
What do you get when you cross a butt with a phone?
A booty call.
What do you call a booty that’s always negative?
A pessimist-cheek.
What’s a booty’s favorite type of bread?
Buns.
Why was the booty so good at poker?
Because it always had a good PAIR.
Sometimes I think back on all the people I’ve lost and remember why I stopped being a tour guide.
Give a man a match, and he’ll be warm for a few hours. Set him on fire, and he’ll be warm for the rest of his life.
You don’t need a parachute to go skydiving. You need a parachute to go skydiving twice.
My grandfather said my generation relies too much on the latest technology. I called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support.
I’ll never forget my father’s last words to me just before he died: “Are you sure you fixed the brakes?”
What’s black and white and red all over?
A crushed nun!
What’s that black stuff between an elephants toes?
Slow natives.
How does a rapper like his eggs?
Hard-boiled, to match his beats!
Why did the rapper become a locksmith?
Because he always had the KEYS!
What do you call a rapper who loves gardening?
Dr. Dre-seed.