Accident jokes
Fall
I don't like making Kobe jokes... they always crash and burn.
What does Kobe now have in common with his helicopter?
They both have torn rotators.
I was trying to hang the lights when I accidentally kicked the chair.
My wife told me to treat her like a princess, so I got drunk and drove through the tunnel.
Bro, Kobe Bryant is singing with the basketball team in his helicopter, celebrating right now, I bet.
Oh wait, I forgot.
What's the difference between Paul Walker and a fly? It's the sound they make when they hit the windshield.
Presidents are normal, physically.
Biden: Trips over a f***ing stair.
Twin Towers? No plane, plane targets.
What would happen if a dam broke when you are on it?
You would be dam unlucky.
What's the worst part about burning your vegetables before dinner?
Explaining what happened to the nursing home while you're hungry.
My friend showed me his broken finger, and I said, "JESUS!" He said his name is Jake.
Why is it bad to climb a tree?
You might fall on an orphan! 🫥
I will never forget my grandfather's last words:
"Can you hold the ladder correctly, damn it!"
Teacher: Little Johnny, why are you late again?
Little Johnny: I had to be there for the birth of our first mixed cow, the white cow fell on the mud! (The teacher faints)
What happened to the depressed kid who tried to high five a tree?
Answer: He was left there hanging.
A guy bought an AMG and crashed it. Now he knows how the Mercedes bends.
Has anybody heard of the guy who passed out in the middle of oncoming traffic? Yeah, he was tired.
Famous last words: I COULD EAT THIS IN ONE BITE!
Paul Walker died Fast and Furious.