Abortion jokes

My hemorrhoids are so bad, I’ve had toilet bowls that looked like abortions.

In some places in the world, you can't get an abortion even after rape. That's so fucked up.

You serve your time, you get out, and you STILL have to pay child support. What a nightmare.

Abortion is not murder, it's just canceling your preorder.

I pregnoot.

How is abortion different from rape? Babies never consent to it.

A woman prayed to be a mother everyday for many years until she crossed a road without looking and got hit by a woman driver and died.

When she met God, she asked Him, "How come you didn't answer my prayers?"

God replied, "I did. I kept sending men to rape you, but you kept on choosing to destroy my creations by having an abortion."

Why is it that when women decide to kill an unborn baby, it's a "CHOICE," but when I decide to drive my F-150 into a playground full of kids, it's called "MURDER"!

What do a 14 year old and the fetus inside her both think?

"Man, my mom's going to kill me!"

How come when women decide to kill their unborn baby it's a "choice"? But when I decide to drive my car into a playground full of children it's called "murder."

I'm not saying you're ugly, but you're the reason God created miscarriages!

As tragic as school shootings are, it's also a quick way to a late-term abortion.

How are abortion and rape different? At least the rape victim usually deserves it and isn't defenseless.

Guess what? I have a baby in ten trashcans.

What do you call a black abortion clinic?

Crime Stoppers.

I regret my abortion.

I didn’t know child labor was an option.

When is rape normal?

When it's called an unplanned pregnancy.

Q: What's the difference between an abortion clinic and Uber Eats?

A: The abortion clinic doesn't deliver.

Yo mama so slutty the abortion clinic gave her a loyalty card and coupon for 20% off her next abortion.

If a pregnant emo kills herself, is that murder-suicide or just abortion?

Hello, welcome to abortion pizza. Your loss is our sauce.