Why was Hellen Keller a bad driver? She was a woman.
Also I have the same Birthday as her so I have the pass.
There are three types of people in the world, those who can count and those who can't.
The day after Chuck Norris was born, he drove his mom home from the hospital.
what is the best power that man can do? they can move the mountain with their tongue.
What's the difference between Stephen and a car? A car loses oil, Stephen loses the ability to walk.
Two muffins are sitting in a bar.
The first muffin says to the bartender, "I'll have the usual".
The second one does not say anything to the bartender because muffins lack the vocal ability of humans and even with the proper anatomy capable of speech access, they would most certainly be entirely unable to comprehend the human language. In fact, the first muffin would indefinitely not be able to provide speech to the bartender. The muffins also lack the muscular structure to be capable of support themselves to being suspended also preventing their access to movement. Even with the human like structure, muffins lack brains which are an essential part to being able to send nerve contact within the legs to be able to move. Also with them lacking a brain structure entirely prevents them from speech. The anatomy simply prohibits the food items mentioned to be able to carry out any of the tasks required to get them to said bar and be able to speak. Thus making the situation untruthful and completely idiotic.
Chuck Norris can make Minute Maid lemonade in 5 seconds.
A guy goes into his attic to clean it out and finds an old oil lamp. He thinks he could sell it instead of throwing it away, so he starts to rub it and out pops this genie. The genie says to him " Thank you for awakening me, I can grant you three wishes as a token of my gratitude." The guy wishes for a billion dollars, the genie grants it. The guy then asks for a huge mansion with 2 Lamborghinis and 2 Ferraris, the genie grants it. The genie says "This is your last wish so really make this one count." The guys says "Well I've always wanted to drive out to hawaiian islands, because airplanes scare me to death, so I would want a highway that could stretch from here all the way to the islands." The Genie says "That is asking for quite a lot and I'm not sure if I can pull that off, Is there anything else you'd want?" The guy says "Well I've been married and divorced three times, and I just can't understand what I've been doing wrong. I've given my ex-wives all the love and care that I could but in the end it was never enough. I would want to have the ability to understand women. The genie thinks for a few moments and says "Do you want a three or four lane highway?"
KSI driving ability
Once I saw a mirror.... and that was when I got the ability to become a ghost
Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman... no other reasons besides that.
What do you call a woman who says she can do anything a man can do?
Wrong.
Jesus could walk on water, and Chuck Norris can swim through land.
Chuck Norris can make 5 minute frosting in 4 minutes.
Chuck Norris knows the location of Atlantis.
Chuck Norris doesn't dial the wrong number. You answered the wrong telephone.
Chuck Norris knows the last digit of pi.
