Worst Jokes Ever
What is the toughest thing about living a vegan life?
Getting up at 5am to milk the almonds.
When the guy next to you says that he kind of agrees with the villain.
Me watching a World War 2 documentary.
Your forehead is so big, Humpty Dumpty didn’t want to fall off!
What's the difference between Ironman and Ironwoman? One is a superhero and the other is a simple command.
A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on how to commit suicide.
The librarian says, “No, you won’t bring it back.”
What's the only gun that doesn't exist in Africa? The water gun.
Say "invented" without the first "n".
Technoblade: It is high vitamin B.
Quackiity: What does vitamin B stand for?
Technoblade: Broke.
I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before kicking the bucket: "Hey, wanna see how far I can kick this bucket?"
I saw this advert in a window that said: “Television for sale, £1, volume stuck on full.” I thought, “I can’t turn that down.”
Police: Where do you live? Child: With my parents.
Police: Where do your parents live? Child: With me.
Police: Where do you all live? Child: Together.
Police: Where is your house? Child: Next to my neighbor's house.
Police: Where is your neighbor's house? Child: If I tell you, would you believe me?
Police: Yes. Now tell me. Child: Next to my house.
Police: ... Child: 😊
Police: *Proceeds to beat the life out of the child*
What's the favorite song of an Emo?
"Chain Hang Low."
Underground Fruit Association of N&C (UGFA)?
We’re bananas!
My girlfriend left me for spending my own money. I buy this bitch thousands upon thousands of dollars worth of stuff, but I spend 100 dollars on a prostitute, she leaves me.
What do the Twin Towers and a bad joke have in common? They never land well.
How does a non-binary ninja slay enemies?
They/Them.
Why do orphans hate Dom Toretto?
Because it's all about family!
Man: Hi, Doc, I have a problem. I take a shit at 6:00 AM every morning.
Doc: What's wrong with that?
Man: I don't wake up until 8:00 AM.
Circumcision is like getting your dick sucked by a male. If you did not like it when you were a teenager, you probably will not like it when you become an adult.
What’s an orphan’s least favorite drink?
Milk, because his parents never came back with it.