Yours jokes
Your mom's hot.
"Is your refiger running?"
"Is your refrigerator running? You better go catch it!"
Your hairline is so crooked that it made Will Smith feel straight.
What do you say when your brother has too many jeans?
"Gene-ious!"
When you're working in the Twin Towers, but you have to turn your computer to airplane mode.
You're the sun in my life, now get 93 million miles away from me.
Your hairline left you because you were too ugly for your push back hairline.
Why did Hellen Keller's dogs run away?
Because wouldn't you runway too if your name was djhdhekdndyekedhekekfjkfurir?
Man: I'm here for the job interview.
Employer: Oh good, good. Sit down. We don't get many people for the interviews.
Man: Just anywhere?
Employer: Yeah, make yourself comfortable. Jackson, right?
Man: Yeah, that's me.
(Shakes hands and sits back down)
Employer: So what makes you eligible for the job, Jackson?
Man: Well, I'm really good at capturing the perfect shot and angle. It really takes dedication to do this type of job. Concentration and willpower, sir.
Employer: I like you already, you're hired!
Man: Wow, thanks, sir. I know I won't do you wrong. I'll work hard for this job!
Employer: You start now! Your first person is a man named John F Kennedy.
Man: What? You want me to just take pictures of him during the parade?
Employer: No.
Man: This... This is a photography job, right?
Employer: No... this is a job employment for man hunting.
You must have a good power supply, because you're easy to turn on!
If you're ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
When you go to a baseball game and they say, "Heads up!" and you put your head up, and the ball hits you in the head.
What do you get when you go to the beach and you get a tan on your feet?
Tan toes.
Jake: Can I go outside?
Mom: Did you clean your room?
Jake: No.
Mom: Then f*ck no.
Jake: Alright, bet.
(Brother named No)
You're so fat, when you wear a yellow raincoat, people call out, "TAXI!"
Can you believe they're still together after everything they've been through?
Who you might ask...
YOUR ASS CHEEKS!
POV: You accidentally get H in your IV drip.
What is the difference between peanut butter and a dead baby? One sticks to the roof of your mouth, while the other one doesn't!
Like if you are emo.
What do my cock and money have in common?
Your mom.