Yours jokes

When someone says you're adopted, say, "But you're still at the orphanage."

I asked an emo girl, "Do you ever get jealous of your phone when it dies?"

You're so fat the only letters of the alphabet you know are K, F, and C.

When I was your age, we had Wacko Jacko, not Florida Man.

yo mama so fat, when she stepped on the scale it told her "I wanted your weight not your phone number."

Why don’t you act like your hairline and kindly take several steps back?

I was walking down the street and saw a kid and I said, "Are you an orphan?"

He said, "Yeah, what gave me away?"

I said, "Your parents at first."

If you're in Alabama, family reunions are basically speed dating events.

Why are there so many scars and cuts on your arm?

Because it's a battlefield.

What does the Bartles and Jaymes wine cooler television ad have in common with ministers who are white Christian nationalists?

They both thank you for your financial support.

Your hairline is like the universe. It's still waiting to be discovered.

Yo hairline is so crooked it makes your gay best friend look straight.

I would tell you an orphan joke, ehh I’ll just tell your parents instead.

Your teeth are so spread out my mom can drive her car through the gap in your teeth.

People say that biting off your finger would be as easy as biting a carrot if your brain didn't try to stop you. How the f do people know that and how many people's fingers did they bite off before coming to that conclusion?

Your hairline's so far back that Dora the Explorer couldn't find it.

Teacher: "What do you think is your purpose in our society?"

Me: "To reduce the population by one."

I'm not saying you're ugly, but you're the reason God created miscarriages!

If all your clothes were stolen, what would you go home in?

The dark.

Two wind turbines were standing on a hill.

One asks, "What's your favorite type of music?"

The other one says, "I'm a big metal fan."