Yours jokes
Your mama is so stupid she stayed up all night so she can get some sleep.
"Demon Slayer" is yay, and who's your favorite in "Demon Slayer"?
The first time I heard your voice, my foreskin fell off.
What's the difference between a cop and bacon?
Bacon is full of fat and makes you feel good. A cop is full of shit and will make you feel their hot steamy cock as they ram it up your ass with some justice sprinkled on top.
What time do you have when an elephant sits on your fence?
Time to get a new fence!
Know your ABCs! Assholes, bitches, and cocaine!
Why did your father go away?
'Cause he needs da milk.
A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a beer. After 10 shots of vodka, the guy had, the bartender figured if he talked to him, he would tell him everything as he’s not sober.
Bartender: Hey, that’s some nice jewellery you have there. It must be expensive.
Guy: Yeah, this bracelet is made of 100% diamond. It cost me like 250 thousand dollars. What a bargain, eh?
Bartender: Seems like you make a lot of money. What do you do for a living?
Guy: I take cash from the bank and don’t give it back. It takes a lot of moral courage to rob banks to provide for my family.
Bartender: What? If that’s the case, then why do you even pay for the jewellery or this beer? You’re a hypocrite, that’s what you are, justifying robbing people as a living.
Guy: Hypocrite? You’re right. I'm living with double standards to justify my actions.
(5 seconds later)
Guy: Aye, open the cash register and give me your wallet or I will blow your fucking brains out. I fucking hate hypocrites and I will not gonna be one of em!
What's the difference between anal and oral?
Oral makes your day whereas anal makes your whole weak.
You're so short that I had to ask God why he made you short-ass toothpick legs.
You're so ugly that when One Direction saw you, they went the OTHER direction!
You're so ugly, Hello Kitty said goodbye.
Me: What are we doing in HPE?
Friend: Fitness.
Me: Fitting deez nuts in your mouth.
What did the booty say when it was asked to help?
"I've got your backside covered!"
That one person who can never bring a smile to your face...
Until you push them down 3 flights of stairs.
Where did your dad go? Because I saw him at the milk shop. Oh wait, there isn't one.
Your mom.
Your dad!
Why can’t anyone sing “hit me with your best shot” at the veterans ball karaoke?
Because every time she sang the line “fire away,” someone started shooting!
How much do the bones in your body weigh? A skele-ton!
"Joe momma" is called that because it means "you're a mistake."