You jokes

When the emo kid looks at you and says, "Fuck you," run!

What happens when you cross a pig and karate?

A pork chop!

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red?

It depends how hard you throw them.

I would have told you about a chemistry joke, but I wouldn't get a reaction.

I would tell you a cat pun, but it's too purr-fect to share.

What do you call a Krispy Kreme Donut combined with a Big Mac from McDonalds?

A Krispy Kreme Mac.

Did you walk up Stephen Hawking's drive?

Don’t worry, he didn’t either.

You are about to hear the funniest joke ever.

My life.

What happens if you sit under a cow?

You get a pat on the head.

Are you a nation leader or an email deleter?

Okay, roses are red, violets are blue, Barney looks better than you.

"Knock, knock." "Who's there?" "Knock, knock." "Knock, knock who?" "Can you let me in now?"

Why can’t you run in a campground?

Because it’s past tents.

Hey John, how are you going?

Helium, yeah good, what about you?

(Hey Liam)

I would tell you a story of my dad... If I knew who he was.

You know what should give up and stay dead?

Fortnite.

"Did you guys make sure Stephen was plugged in?"

Did you hear about the shark that ate a key shop?

I think it got lockjaw after that.

"Bippity Bobbity Boo, Boo Radley is coming for you!"

What Happens When You Get Caught On Fire?

— You Lost To Slmebody When You Were Playing Hide And Seek, And The Place Where You Got Caught Was Exactly On A Patch Of Fire.