You jokes

What do you and Joe Biden have in common?

Nobody loves you or him.

You know why you never wanna fly with an orphan?

'Cause then they know they won't die alone.

Q: What do you say when Trump is still president during 2020? A: Magic!

Why can't an orphan be in a Scream movie?

It's always someone you know.

Are you a horse, because I want to ride you?

Are you Pikachu? Cause I want to take a "pik" at you.

A husband and wife get into a fight. The wife says, "Go blow off some steam. I’ll let you fuck a hooker." So he does that, comes back, and says, "I’m off the hook now!"

This ole boy picked up this hooker and was getting some head driving down the road, and she started gagging on it a little, and he said, "Oh yeah baby, you like that big dick, don't ya?" and she said, "Oh baby, it's not that, ya asshole stinks!"

"Yol, what do you think about sex?"

"Good."

Have you heard of the Xbox game Sea of Thieves?

See if these nuts fit in your mouth.

Do you ever get that feeling where you're just going through a school parking lot, then you realize that there are no parking lots?

Why can't you hear the pterodactyl go to the bathroom?

Because the "p" is silent.

How do pirates like their movies?

You already know the answer, don't you?

Well...

ARRR rated! Huh huh huh...

What do you call six gay men in a war? Rainbow Six Siege.

What do you call a person with a fat brain?

A fat neek!

What do you call a Chinese car thief?

Tommy Tookamota.

What do you call hot cups?

Sunglasses.

Kid: Dad, where do you work?

Dad: I.C.U.P.

Kid: HAHAHAH!!!! See you pee.

What do you say to your pet when you're super tired, slow, and worn out?

"I'm totally dogging it today..."

What did the window say to the door?

"What are you squeaking about? I'm the one with the panes!"

Get it?