You jokes

You abuse me that I have no beards, but your sugar daddy shaved them off to look cute. 🤔

You know what? I know five fat people, and you're four of them!

My girlfriend asked, "Why is this test so long and hard?"

I then said, "You know what else is long and hard..."

She was amazed!

What do you call a flat-chested emo?

Your disabled joke on you can't stand.

You are emo.

If you want an orphan joke, just look in a mirror.

Daughter: Hey Dad, can I use your car?

Dad: Sure, but first you have to give me a blow job."

Daughter: Okay, (proceeds to service dad). Dad, ewww, your dick tastes like shite!"

Dad: Oh, that's right, I lent your brother the car.

Annabeth: "Percy, whaters up with you?"

Roses are red, violets are blue. I see you, I see you; you would have to work out.

If a black person calls you a cracker, let them say it. You can say things they can't say, like, "Thanks for the warning, officer!"

Your hairline went so back, you had to cry to your mama!

Warning! Cringe Alert!

What happens when you leave your phone at jail?

It becomes a cell phone.

"Fuck you, do something about it!"

How do you beat Hellen Keller in musical chairs?

You move the chairs.

I lit my girlfriend on fire. I guess you could say I ignited her fire.

Roses are red, violets are blue. You belong in a zoo, but don't worry, I'll be there too. Just not in a cage, I'll be laughing at you.

When your little brother knocks your two Jenga towers you made with his toy airplane,

You: "Hey, stop trying to recreate the Twin Towers!"

How do you fit 3 gay men on a bar stool?

Flip it upside down.

The water in the shower evaporates before it reaches you.