You jokes
How do you cause an African parade?
You just carry a water bottle around and hold it up!
Your hairline is so bad that you have a humongous forehead.
Little Johnny says: “Mom, you know that lovely vase in the dining room that’s been handed down from generation to generation?”
Mom replies: “Yes. What about it?”
He says: “Well, the last generation just dropped it.”
The moment when you throw the nut away and try to eat the shell.
You're so black, when you get near the sun, we go into a solar eclipse.
Memes
No wonder why I can't find you. You're in the trash bin.
Your hairline's so far back, you need binoculars to see it.
Man, your hairline is so far back, archaeologists couldn't find it.
Do you wanna lose ten pounds of ugly fat? Cut off your head.
I hope next time you ask your teacher to go to the toilet, your teacher says no, but when someone else asks, the teacher says yes to them.
Warning! Cringe Alert!
What happens when you leave your phone at jail?
It becomes a cell phone.
I lit my girlfriend on fire. I guess you could say I ignited her fire.
If you can't see your family... you're an orphan.
You are emo.
If you want an orphan joke, just look in a mirror.
Daughter: Hey Dad, can I use your car?
Dad: Sure, but first you have to give me a blow job."
Daughter: Okay, (proceeds to service dad). Dad, ewww, your dick tastes like shite!"
Dad: Oh, that's right, I lent your brother the car.
I would give you a thrashing, but that would be animal abuse.
Me: Hey God, are you there? It's me, Michael.
God: *SILENCE*
Me: If any gods exist, they better say or do something this instant!
God: *SILENCE*
Never gonna give you up.
My mom went to take out the trash, but I couldn't find you.
What's the difference between a pregnant girl and a light bulb?
... You can unscrew a light bulb, but you can't unscrew a pregnant girl.