You jokes
What do you call it when Portericans surround your house?
A spicket fence!
What do you get when you cross a cow with a fish?
A genetically unstable animal that is impossible and would die instantly upon existing. If it could live, it would be a deformed, parasitic tumor that undulates through people.
2019, where you can change your gender at a snap of a finger.
You make the juice go through my power brick.
What do you call a man who lost his car??
Carlos
Memes
A bear is like your best mate, Harry.
If you stab them, they die from a stab wound.
Make a wish kid: I want to meet Mac Miller.
Make a wish staff: You will soon, chief.
Can you fuck me, please?
Eagle: "You know why hunting me would be a bad idea?
Because it is ILL-EAGLE!"
What do you call the day before Christmas Eve? Christmas Adam.
Why should you never fart in an Apple store?
Because they have no Windows!
What do you do with a dog that has no legs? Take him for a drag.
We should enjoy the present while it's here. Do you know why they call it the present? Because it's a gift.
Eggs
You crack me up!
When you say, "I'm high!"
But then you fall off.
Poipole walks into a bar and says “poipoipoipoi.”
The bartender says, “Sorry, but in order to get takeout, you have to know how to speak a foreign language.” Poipole says “Pika!”
1, 2 look at your shoes.
3, 4 they look better than yours.
5, 6 you have no friends.
7, 8 you look like a ape.
9, 10 don't you like men?
11, 12 hell naw I like females.
If the teacher tells you to stand up if you're not gay and there's that one kid in the wheelchair.
You know we straight with doin' your mom.
What do you get if you cross Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama? A blonde n1gger cunt.