You jokes
Hi Mom, how are you doing?
Two skeletons meet at the graveyard at noon.
"What the heck are you doing here?"
"I couldn't sleep."
If you ever get mad at an orphan, punch them in the face... What are they going to do, tell their parents?
What do you call a magician that makes beer? Brew-dini?
Why do you want me?
Cus u like me...
What do you mean?
You love me.
No.
Look down.
Fact: If you jump off a 12-story building, you will not like the result.
I didn’t wanna tell you, but I had to write this song, cause I’m in your house every night doin' your mom.
What do you call a mom that is yours?
Your mom!
Did you hear about the man who swallowed his watch?
He went to the doctor hoping he could give him something to help pass the time.
I still remember my granddad's last words,
"Are you still holding the ladder?"
What's the difference between a baby and putty?
You can only eat one.
One dollar bill is with a five dollar bill. The five says, "I make more cents than you."
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
A.
A who?
A-bless you!
What do you call a guy with a sandwich?
A guy with a sandwich.
Nobody knows how bad you smell.
What day should you drink water?
Thursday, Thirstday!
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Olive.
Olive who?
Olive you a lot!
What do you call a PEIS?
What do you call a hill with cows on it?
A Moo-ntain.
Me: I fucked your mom.
Orphan: I don't have a mom so you fucked the air.