You jokes
Q: How can you spell cold with two letters? A: IC (icy).
Q: What state is surrounded by the most water? A: Hawaii (this is really just a trick riddle).
Q: David's father had three sons: Snap, Crackle, and what's the third son's name? A: David.
Life is like a game of poker, guys start by going with them clubs, ladies follow with a set of hearts, guys put down the diamonds, and before you know it you got a full house.
Gf: Babe, do you love me?
Bf: Count the stars and that's how much I love you.
Gf: But it's morning, sweetie...
Bf: Exactly.
Gf: :0, I'll take that as a no.
Kids, next time you have school dinners, make sure you have something you actually like so you don't have to shove all your food over to one side of the plate to make it look like you've eaten more than you actually have.
I'm bone dry in material, but I have a skeleTON of skeleton jokes. After I tell you all these rib ticklers, you will have a bone to pick with if you didn't find that funny, you outta rip my spine out.
You: What you doing?
I wonder what you’re doing because you’re bad at math, hahahahaha!
Don't you feel an empty feeling...
IN YOUR SKULL!
What do you call an emo girl with a flat chest?
A cutting board.
How do you piss off a color blind person?
Give them a Rubik's cube.
Sayori: *dies*
Monika: "You kinda left her hanging... 😊"
MC: "😨"
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Bill Cosby.
Bill Cosby who?
Never mind, I’ll come back when you’re sleeping.
Q: How do you stop babies from being conceived through incest?
A: Cum on your cousin's face.
What's something you can say in church and while having sex?
I come in the name of the Lord.
What do you call a cow with horns? A horny cow.
How do you know you’re at a gay cookout? They’re putting your sausage between two buns.
Did you know Disney is making a movie for suicidal people?
They're calling it Finding Emo.
Say what you want about Jeffery Dahmer, but he always managed to get a head.
Your gene pool is so shallow, you could break your neck diving in.
How do you stop all homophobic heterosexual white men from using all public men's restrooms at a rest area?
Make sure that all public men's restrooms at the rest area are always occupied with gay men that have long and thick big cocks, regardless of skin color.
How do you know your sister’s on her period? Your sisters pussy taste funny