You jokes
A man walks into a bar. He sees a family court judge, his wife, her lawyer, and a police officer. He gets on his hands and knees and prays to God out loud. The bartender says, "Why are you praying?" He says, "Because I just saw the 4 horsemen of the apocalypse, and the bible tells me when I see them the end is at hand."
What is a victimless crime in the state of Michigan if you are an able-bodied man who is well-endowed, not white, and not a heterosexual male?
A white male who is heterosexual and physically disabled who is sodomized by an able-bodied and well-endowed gay male who is not white inside the men's locker room at the gym.
Your mama so fat, when she walked past the TV, you missed two episodes.
What gets long when you put it, slides into holes, and likes to squeeze between boobs?
A seatbelt.
Roses are red, violets are blue.
My heart is dead because of you.
Actually, not because of you... because of your face.
What’s the worst thing about having a daughter with cancer? You can’t pull on her hair.
What do you call a bird orgy?
No bird control.
Your parents are so proud of you. They LOVE you! <3
"What did one wall say to the other?"
"I'll meet you at the corner!"
What do you call a black person scuba diving? A black diver (an armor set from DeepWoken). Did anyone laugh at that, or?? Augh, I guess I'm alone.
Father: I'm taking your toys to the orphanage.
Child: But why?
Doctor: I'm going to have to turn you away.
Orphan: But why?
Your hairline is so far back, it was in a different time zone on a flight with you.
This isn’t much of a joke, but here's a pickup line. Are you a marshmallow? Because I wanna put my stick in you.
What do you call an American house?
A gun safe.
How do you ground a Gen Z?
Make them go outside and socialize.
Mum: Why are roses red?
Child: Stop, Mum, you never make jokes.
Mum: I made you.
What do you call a blonde who's dyed her hair brunette?
Artificial intelligence.
"If you can make them laugh and giggle, you can make their booty shake and jiggle."
What happens when you find a bomb at your local bazaar?
It becomes a flee market.
What do you call a person in America that is not a retard?
A foreign exchange student.