You jokes
How do you know Adam and Eve were White?
Have you ever tried taking a rib from a Black man?
What do you call a gay guy eating Cheerios?
Fruit Loops.
What do you call an autistic kid in a school shooting?
Target practice.
What’s the difference between jelly and jam?
You can’t “jelly” it in her ass.
Do you like soccer? My favorite player is Ronaldo, but we can still get Messi.
Do you think John F. Kennedy went for a ride in Dallas just to clear his head because his wife said he was close-minded?
Don't listen to people when they say you have a dad bod. You don't.
You have a father figure.
A pedophile and a priest run a race.
You can’t beat yourself in a race!
They say I have a silver tongue, I'll let you make it white.
We aren't ghosts, but I'll take you under the sheets.
What do you call an orphan’s family reunion?
Me time.
What’s one thing you can say during a family dinner and in bed?
"Where are the kids?"
How do you break up a fight between two gay men?
Say, "Can you get straight to the point?"
Did you know your pupils are the last part to stop working when you die? They dilate.
At the job interview, they asked me, “Where do you see yourself in five years?”
I told him, “I think we’ll still be using mirrors in five years.”
Roses are red, violets are blue. I thought Voldemort was ugly, then I saw you.
What's the difference between a casino and a church?
You actually mean it when you pray at a casino.
What do you call plane crash victims?
Down to earth people.
A doctor walks into the room and tells his patient, "I have some bad news for you. You really have to stop masturbating."
The man looks aghast and says, "Oh my God, doc, why?!"
The doctor replies, "I'm trying to examine you."
How do you break up two blind guys fighting?
Yell, "My money's on the guy with the knife!"