You jokes
If you think vanilla and chocolate ice cream is just light and dark mode.
What do you call someone that no one loves?
An orphan.
Yo hairline go back so far you could drive 1,000,000 miles and still not find it.
Did you hear about the cello player who dreamed he was performing Bolero?
He woke up and found out it was true.
You're so fat that when you went outside, you broke the 2-meter rule for COVID.
Hey, you know what I told the kid in a wheelchair?
I told him to be a stand-up comedian!
Q: How do you know when Putin is lying?
A: His lips move.
Q: How do you know when someone is an opposition leader to Putin?
A: When they are falling from their balcony.
What does a gun and gum have in common?
When you pull one out, everyone wants to be your friend.
Have you heard the 9/11 joke yet?... It was pretty fire.
You know what I said to the chair? "Sit!" But it didn't move. Hahaha!
Did you see that car crash today where the guy got the entire left side of his body cut off?
He's all right now.
What do you call an emo with knife cuts on their wrist?
A barcode.
Did you hear what happened to the Italian chef?
He pasta-way...
You have to be a good mom to be a MILF.
I went to a tall girl and I asked her, "What do you do for a living?" She says, "An account." So I reply with, "An accounting the hairs on people's heads," and then I run away.
The youngest of the Twin Towers said, "Goodbye, brotha." But the one who got hit, which is the oldest, said, "If I go down, you go with me!"
What do you call a Mexican who lost their car?
Carlos.
Are you Spanish, because I will say "Hola."
Do you go to a biblioteca? Also, in Spanish, you will never guess the word "biblioteca." Find it, I dare you.
What do you call a gang of emo kids?