You jokes
Is there a really annoying girl at your school and she's so fake? Well, say this:
Me: Hey, I have a nickname for you.
Her: Really? What?
Me: Sweet-in-low.
Her: Why?
Me: Because you're artificial.
Why can't you say hi to a drug addict?
They'll say "yea."
I told my friend you should definitely quit smoking, but he could not find me because he was already up in flames.
If someone says nobody asked, you could say, "Well, nobody asked for you to talk!"
How do you scare a lot of people in New York?
Open a mobile hotspot named "Delta Inflight Wifi."
Memes
You're so short, Aiden looked tall.
If you’re American when you go in the bathroom...
... and American when you come out, what are you in the bathroom?
European.
I hope you SEA me around later, 'cause I SHORE won't stay here for long.
Have you heard of Wendy's?
Yea, Wendy's nuts in you mouth.
Why did your daddy not come back with the milk?
Because you have no dad because your dad never loved you.
If you can't stand the heat, sit!
What do you call a Gary Dinosaur?
A mega-sore-ass.
"Water exists."
Airport security: "What the fuck did you just say?"
What do you say to an emo's wrist?...
"I like ur cut G."
Grandma isn’t responding. Close app, wait, cancel.
Which do you choose?
Knock knock.
You: Who's there?
Urmom.
What do you call a questioning Constanta?
Curious George.
Me and my friend roasting each other.
Him: Your dad dropped you on purpose, but my dad dropped me by accident.
Me: But after dropping you, he never picked you up.
Do you know why boys can't ask girls out? Because they don't have any balls to ask girls out!
I would invite you to play baseball, but there's no home for you to run to.