You jokes
If your nose runs and your feet smell, you are probably built upside down.
Son: Dad, if I told you I was gay, would you still love me?
Dad: Don’t be silly son, you were an accident. I never loved you in the first place.
When your grades get mailed to your house when you expect to get them in school.
When you get home, your mom is there with the belt, going 1k miles per hour.
What do you call a deer that has no eyes?
No eye deer.
What do you call a deaf dog? As you like, he doesn't hear you anyway.
Jim was caught beating a man up. Brooklyn took a picture of his license plate with her phone and told him, "Your life is ruined!" So Jim took a picture of her, and the next thing you know, he said, "Now my phone is ruined!"
Why is basketball called basketball?
Because you play with a basket.
I'll never forget my grampa's last words, "Stop shaking the ladder, you cunt!"
Doctor: You should stop masturbating.
Me: Doc, I'm almost done.
How do you call an autistic kid with a pistol?
Special forces.
When the emo kid says let’s play truth or dare, You know it’s about to hang over.
What do you call an orphan's family region?
Me time.
What do you call mouse sneakers? Squeakers!
If reincarnation is correct, if you die now, you can be reborn and live a second life. If you were born in Ukraine, you can immediately live a third life.
Did you know that..
Studies show 9 in 10 Americans do not have basic math skills.
Oh, thank god I'm in that 1%.
Hell you fuck, bitch, dick!
What do you call a deaf person?
Whatever you want!
It's kinda sad seeing you attempt to put your whole vocabulary in one sentence. Oh wait, you only said three words.
What does one emo kid say to the other?
"I like your cuts, G."
What did the toaster say to the slice of bread? "I want you inside me."