You jokes
Are you going to jump? Can I jump with you?
A bully says, "I get 10x more girls than you" to a gay kid.
Then the gay kid says, "10 X 0 is still 0."
When you ask for plastic surgery, they said, "We could not fix you, but the only way is to wear a mask to fix your ugly face."
When your boy tries to have a bad day while you're on your period:
Oh, you have a cold? How rude of me. I just laid an egg, and now my body is ripping down the walls of my uterus. But can I get you a tissue?
Man, your hairline is so bad it started from the beginning of the month to the end!
What do you find at the end of a rainbow?
Answer: W.
My friend thinks he is smart. He told me an onion is the only food that makes you cry, so I threw a coconut at his face.
What do you call a priest meeting his illegal children?
A holy CUMmunion.
You look too old to be living with your grandma.
What do you call a midget born from precum?
"Half Nut!"
What do you call a girl with no legs?
Unshakeable.
Tyler is ugly.
If you are called Tyler, change your name.
Boss: How good are you at PowerPoint?
Me: I Excel at it.
Boss: Was that a Microsoft pun?
Me: Word.
Orphan: I'm hungry.
Dad: Let's go to KFC.
Orphan 2: Boy, you don't got a dad!
You should always wash your sex toys. That’s why priests invented baptism.
What comes in and comes out, but you should never miss it?
Any ideas?
SHIT!!!!
You're so fat that you cause your heart to have panic attacks.
When a person in a wheelchair says, "You've never taken a step in my shoes," and you say, "To be honest, you haven't either."
You don't need a parachute to go skydiving, just to go skydiving twice.
What do you call two Hispanics with Parkinson's disease?
Maracas.