You jokes

What do you call a convict in prison for touching little girls? A boy named Brandon.

What do you do if you see an Indian woman getting raped? Nothing, since raping is a normal everyday part of Indian culture.

You don't want to know why it takes so long to put a dead woman in a mass-produced coffin in a pre-buried grave dug by machinery that is then filled by mourners.

Bro, stop. You guys are saying the same jokes over and over. If you're gonna tell a 9/11 joke, just go laugh about the Great Thumps.

What do you call an emo committing suicide while filming it?

America’s Funniest Home Videos.

(lol)

Taking an emo kid grocery shopping does have its perks.

You get to scan their wrists for discounts!

What's the only good part of your crush dying before you have the chance to bang her?

She can't say no!

What do you call a Mexican Transformer? Optimus Juan!

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? One, you just need to throw it hard enough.

I went up to a kid and asked, "Are you an orphan?" They said, "Yes, what gave me away?" I said, "Your parents."

What do you call a cow with no legs?

A cow with no legs.

Person 1: “You assume I’m gay because I have rainbow hair, I’m wearing a rainbow shirt, and I have a rainbow pride flag behind me?”

Person 2: “You assume I’m disabled because I have deformed arms and limbs, no legs, and I ride around in a wheelchair?”

What's the difference between a piano and a fish?

You can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish!

American: How do you use a PC?

Amish: We use a potato.

What do you call a man with no body and no nose?

Nobody knows. No body, nose.

Why can't you tell a joke in a corn maze?

Because there's too many ears.

When you are f***ing your girlfriend and then she tells you that you f**k like your guys' dad.

Then you f**k your mom and she says the same thing.

Spell "I cup..." "I see you pee!"

What did one poop say to the other poop? What's the matter? You look flushed!

The pastor sees little Johnny sitting on the church steps. Little Johnny is fixated on something. The pastor looks closer and sees that Johnny is stirring up something in an old coffee can. He says, "What you got there little Johnny?"

"This here is turpentine, the most POWERFUL liquid in the world!", says Johnny.

The pastor shakes his head, sits down next to Johnny, and says, "Now you know that's not true, son. Holy water is the most powerful liquid in the world. One drop of holy water on a pregnant woman's stomach and the next morning she'll pass a baby boy."

Little Johnny says, "Well that may be true, but one drop of this on a cat's ass and he'll pass a motorcycle!"