You jokes
One time there was a depressed man standing in the middle of a train track. A girl said, "Excuse me, can you move, please? I'm trying-" Then the man stopped her sentence and said, "How is your t-shirt so clean?" Then she said back, "Easy, hung it up."
Is it just me, or are you the prettiest person I've seen today?
It's quite ironic that people tell you "Happy Birthday," then they want to give you a spanking.
What do you call the mushy stuff between sharks' teeth?
A slow swimmer...
There are times I miss you, that I wish I could remember where I hid your body.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Ken.
Ken who?
Can you walk the dog for me?
How do you make an apple turnover?
You push it down a hill.
What do you say when a person trips?
You say, "Why you trippin'?"
What did the orange say to the other orange?
I orange you glad!
If you read this, you lost your v card.
Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floorboard?
Don't worry, he was just going through a stage.
They say making and having friends comes with some benefits. I guess you could say I have friends with benefits.
Knock knock.
Who's there? Discord server.
Discord server who?
This server is dead, bye bitches, I got better things to do than watch you sit here and type like a sloth.
My mom told me, "You son of a b!tch." I told her, "I may be a son of a b!ch but at least I am not the bitch." She hated me forever.
Denki: Hey, Mineta, I have a joke for you.
Mineta: Go on.
Denki: Uraraka's booty.
Mineta: I don't get it.
Denki: Exactly.
Mineta: ^cries T_T^
Five little monkeys jumping on a bed.
One fell off and bumped his head. Mamma called Walmart, and Walmart said,
"We will give you a replacement!"
You were born on the highway. That's where most accidents happen.
You must have a good power supply, because you're easy to turn on!
What do you call a pig that does karate?
A pork chop!
How do you say "nose" in Spanish?
hmm.... No sé.