My teacher asked us what sex is. My friend, Bobby, got up and said in a loud, clear voice, "Sex is a temptation caused by a sensation, where a boy puts his location into a woman's destination to increase the population of the next generation. Do you understand my explanation, or do you need a demonstration?" The teacher shot him 23 times before she fainted.
You Jokes
What do you call a tall terrorist? Labomb James.
What do you do when a Panera Bread panera breads?
Panera Bread.
Teacher: Stand up if you think you are stupid.
After a while, a student stands up.
Teacher: So you think you are stupid?
Student: No, I'm not stupid. I just felt bad because you were standing by yourself.
I prank called someone saying, "SON! IT'S ME, SON! I'M COMING FOR YOU!!!" My friend next to me asked who I was calling, and I said, "the orphanage."
What do you call a dwarf suicide bomber?
A party popper.
How do you get a fat kid to lose weight?
You pay the ice cream man to keep on driving. IDK.
I'd give you a nasty look, but you've already got one.
If I told you, you had a nice body, would you hold it against me?
Did you know that new Teslas don't come with the new car smell?
They come with an Elon Musk.
What do you call a kid in a wheelchair on fire?
Hot wheels.
What's life if you don't have one...
Top tip; if your wife asks, "What would you like to do to my body?" 'Identify it' is the wrong answer.
- Got myself a bathroom scale so now I know exactly how much I poop.
- Right. So you weigh yourself before and after you poop and calculate the difference? That’s cool.
- Oh...that might actually be even easier.
Helen Keller is the kind of person to ask you what the time is.
When you get mad, just punch an orphan. Who are they going to tell? Their mom?
If you have anger problems, hit an orphan, because who are they going to tell? Not their parents.
How many children can you fit in a box?
Maybe five if you have a trash compactor.
Your mama is so fat that she took a picture at Christmas, and it's still downloading.
What do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
... family photo.
