You jokes
I hate how politically correct the world is these days, you can't even say "black paint."
You have to say, "Leroy, please paint that wall!"
What is it you can give at Christmas and still keep? Herpes.
Q. What do you get when you cross a mentally disabled person with a pedophile? A. Jeffy Epstein.
What do you call a tent for lesbians?
Finger Hut.
There are 206 bones in my body.
When I look at you, it becomes 207.
If you drive a Lamborghini, then you have a tiny weenie.
I’d like to take you to the movies, but unfortunately, they don’t let you bring your own snacks.
Dad: Ok son, if you fail this test, you're no longer my child, ok?
Son: Ok dad.
AFTER TEST
Dad: Hey son, how'd the test go?
Son: Son?
A wife says to her husband, "You're always pushing me around and talking behind my back." "What do you expect?" he says, "You're in a fucking wheelchair!"
Did you hear about the man who jumped off a bridge in France? He was in Seine.
Did you know that the F in orphan means family?
There's no F in orphan?
Exactly.
What does one orphan say to another orphan on Opposite Day? "Do you want to go home?"
What’s the difference between a prostitute and a homeless shelter?
You can shit a load inside of a prostitute, but if you try it in a shelter, you get arrested.
What do you call a cow without legs? Ground beef.
What is the last thing you wanna see during a prostate exam?
The doctor taking off his watch.
A wife asked her husband, "What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?"
He looked at her from head to toe and replied, "I like your sense of humor!"
One man's trash is another man's treasure. That sucks when you are adopted.
What do you call a terrorist in water?
A bath bomb 😁
What do you call an Iraqi swimming in the water?
A bath bomb.
Q: What do you do with a sick chemist?
A: If you cannot helium, you have to curium. If you cannot curium, you have to barium!