Official Dj Penaldo playlist.
1. "I'm a fraud" 2. "I need you (ft. Tap-ins)" 3. "I Want to Leave Mid United" 4. "Back where I belong (ft. Europa league)" 5. "TY Eder" 6. "Nobody wants me (Rejectnaldo Remix)" 7. "Fuck that kid (ft. Lil Broke phone)" 8. "Sewy (Benched +arms crossed version)"
Dad: We are giving your toys to the orphanage.
Kid: Why?
Dad: So you won't get bored.
The IRS hates when you don't have to pay your taxes with this one mind-blowing trick.
Whoever stole my Microsoft Office account, I'll make you pay. You have my word!
I: "Get a boomerang."
Type: "Why?"
Me: "Because for frisbee, you need friends."
What do you call a lesbian with braces? A box cutter.
What do you call a decapitated politician?
A severed head of state.
Teacher: "You know you can't sleep in my class."
Boy: "I know. Maybe if you were a little quieter, I could."
Joker gives Batman a phone.
Thomas: "Uhh, son, we need to talk... about the uhh, dressing up."
Martha: "Hello dearie, Brucie, is it ok if you visit me when you go to Joker's house?"
I went to my sister's room one day. I saw a trophy, so I asked my sister how she won it. My sister said the neighbors gave it to her because she gave out the best hand jobs in the neighborhood. I guess my sister put her hands to good use.
How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? All of them if you keep reloading.
John F. Kennedy: "Are you a bullet? Because I can't get you out of my head."
I was in math class, and we were learning geometry. My teacher said, "PENTAGON!" then all of a sudden, PENALDO burst into the room! He thought we were talking about PENS, so he came looking for some because he's a finished pen merchant! Shame on you, Penaldo, for ruining my education! 🤬
Night chat. #love you forever maybe until I die! 🌸
What do you do when you see a spaceman?
Park in it, man!
What do you call the wife of a hippie? A Mississippi.
If you have 13 apples in one hand and 10 oranges in the other, what do you have?
Big hands.
What do you call an orphan family tree?
A tree stump.
I see, you guys jokers are SANS-ational!
A fat girl was dancing on the table, and I said, "Nice legs." She says, "You really think so?" And I say, "Yes, definitely, most tables would have been broken by now."
