You jokes

Parent

What is the difference between you and me? I have parents and yours left...

Bar

A guy walks into a bar with a 44 magnum and yells, "Who the fuck fucked my wife?" The guy behind the bar says, "Mate, you don't have enough bullets!"

Memes

Wife

When your wife takes 30 minutes to get ready.

Me: Takes five minutes.

Me: Hun, you done yet?

Dick

Little Red Riding Hood says to the wolf: "What a big dick you have!"

Wolf: "The better to f*** you with!"

Group

Hi, my name is unknown guy! Please comment on the pictures I show you and join my group!

Home

Why can't you go home tonight? Because you haven't got a home, it's moved.

Mind

My bestie: Are you dirty-minded?

Me: Do I have dirt in my mind? No.

Makeup

Me: Sister, are you wearing makeup?

My sister wearing all the world's makeup.

Sister: Just a little.