Someone asks a question: Who? Who asked? Boom, you"re done xxx.
You Jokes
What do you call a cow that is secret?
AnonyMOOus.
Kid says, “Are you a soldier?”
Soldier says, “Mhm.”
Kid says, “I wanna be a soldier someday.”
Soldier says, “Really?”
The kid says, “Yeah, but father says I don’t have the balls to be a soldier, but he’s right. I’m a FUCKING PRETTY PRETTY PRINCESS!!!"
Did you hear about the nurse who couldn’t swim?
She ended up under the doc[tor].
What do you call a dev that is dead?
A deadveloper.
What do you call a too round egg?
A prEGGnant egg.
Hi, how are you? Busy doing right? I just texted me and my dad and walk home from home and walk home and walk walk home.
Hi, how are you? I was busy doing something right. I just texted because me and my dad were going to.
If you had a friend like me, would you kill me?
How are Eggs Benedict and a blow job alike?
You can't get either one at home.
If I get an atom, I would split it with you.
In life you either yeet or get yeeted, or you beat or get beaten.
I guess I failed.
Teacher: Ok kids, time to go home.
The orphan: What is home?
Teacher: Here, I have somewhere for you.
*puts in trash can*
What do you call your kids?
What are you on? YouTube.
Don't commit suicide, that stuff kills you.
When you went to McDonald's and sat down, you were so fat, they said, "TBC."
What do you call a rapper who CAN’T GET OUT OF BED IN THE MORNING?
Snooze Dogg.
What's one thing that you can say about a train, but not your girlfriend?
Do you want to be in Heaven with Jesus, our savior, or be on Earth with bad things?