You jokes
How do you make a trash can leak?
Hit it with an axe until it becomes part of the cosmos!
"If you can't win, lose."
- Sun Tzu, The Art of War.
Q: Why can't you tell 9/11 jokes in a comedy club?
A: They always crash and burn.
You're so skinny, you can barely fit through a door crack.
Bro, you look like you got your hair from the Roblox avatar shop.
Memes
You are so ugly, when you were born, your mother asked for a receipt.
What do you call your mom?
Monkey.
You're so skinny when you lift up weights, you fall through your asshole.
You know, that I see my sister at home from school. She says everyone bullies me. I say, "Because you're a fat a**."
Why do you have to pay to see Russian people?
Because the zoo is not free, Duhhhhh🙄
I crashed into the back of a car at the lights today.
A really short guy got out of it and said, “I’m not happy.”
I said, “Well, which one are you then?”
Toilet: hi You: hi what?
Roses are red, the grass is greener, when I see you, I play with my wiener.
Never give up, 'cause never gonna give you up.
Never gonna let you down, never gonna run around and desert you, never gonna make you cry, never gonna say goodbye, never gonna desert you.
What do you call it when Panera Bread is running away?
Panera fled.
What do you call a person who measures air? Airometer.
Did I tell you I finally got my wife to scream during sex? Yeah, you should have heard her the other day when I walked in on her.
Science experts say when you get mad, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
What do you call a shake? Shake ya booty!
What did the Titanic say to the people as it went down?
"I now nominate you to the ice bucket challenge!"