You jokes

"Ketchup with me, you are too slow."

A guy is at his locker, and a girl comes and says, "Hey, I love you."

He says, "Okay, cool." She then replies and says, "Well, what do you think about our love?" He says, "Count the stars."

Then she says, "Oh, infinity!" and he replies with, "Nope, it's just a waste of time."

Neighbor 1: Knock knock.

Neighbor 2: You forgot the 3rd knock.

Odin: .....

What do you call an orphan? Homeless.

What's an orphan's worst favorite movie? Home Alone.

Why can't homeless people find a home? Because they're orphans.

What do you do to a pregnant lady on a step?

Push 'em.

What do you call a group of Indians that eat curry all the time?

The Munch Bunch.

What do you call a herd of winning cows?

A topside.

Wanna hear a funny joke?

You

I will remember my brother's last words: if you can't put a fork in a toaster, how about a spoon?

I know where you live! I saw you before!

What did the parents say to the orphans?

"YOU CAN'T SEE ME!"

If I were a judge and gave you a sentence, I would sentence you to life for your looks.

Me: Can you give me some drumsticks to eat?

Brother: Why though?

Me: So I can just drum up an appetite.

If you have a bad day, just think there are at least 15 people who care about you.

Knock knock.

Fuck you!

What do you call a fish with no booty?

Would you rather have a menstrual period with horrible cramps for 200 days straight (including men)?

Or eat 10 lbs of dog s**t every day for 100 days?

Would you rather eat a girl out who has: herpes, COVID, and AIDS while she is on her period?

Or eat live worms, bats, and mice?

Do you want to wear my sombrero?

Or is that nacho style?

How do you make an orphan shut up?

You tell his mom.