You jokes
How do you quiet a baby down?
Make baby back ribs for dinner.
What do you call butter without an expiration date?
A miracle butter, because wow!
What day can you have sex on?
Answer: Wednesday. Why? Because it's hump day.
Man: Oi, dude, why did you shoot the orphans!?
Other man: Because.
Man: Because why!?
Other man: Because who are they gonna tell? Their parents?
Me: *writes Kahoot about me then finishes.*
Me and friend: *plays Kahoot.*
A question: When is (my name) happy?
Friend: *puts a good answer and gets wrong.*
Answer: Never, only a portion.
Friend: Do you need help?
Memes
Why can’t you yell at a kid?
Because the cops are after you.
Me: Says to kid at adoption center, "You're adopted!"
Me and kid: hug.
Thought this site needed a little bit of nice jokes.
Want to know something good about people giving ZERO fucks about you and living in the country?
Everybody knows nothing.
What do screen doors and blondes have in common?
The more you bang them, the looser they get.
Dad: What's the difference between an ELEPHANT and a POSTBOX?
Son: I don't know.
Dad: I'd better not trust you with my post then.
Best part about being an orphan?
Not spending 1h30 at the table every night with your dad yelling, "What's 2*3?!!" And you crying, "I don't know!!!"
How do you make a tissue dance?
You give it a little boogie.
You are so small that you play hockey against the curb!
Armless child: Can you give me a hand??
Me: Ok.
You can't put an orphan on house arrest if there isn't a house to arrest them to.
What did the fat girl say to the donut?
"I'm going to eat you tonight..."
Did you know there is no "p" in the alphabet? ABCDEFGHIJKLM(NOP)!
When your sister asks you to entertain her, you don't!
What do you think of your mom? I can do it.
Why did the number 10 make friends with 0? Because you have $100 dollars.