You Jokes

Brother

Ok, everyone on this website... I HAVE NO BROTHERS OR SISTERS. The person who claims he's my "brother" is firesharky. He is trying to get fame. Never listen to him. He will lie and trick you to think I have a brother, but I don't.

Technology

I hope you see this plugin, but if you're listening to this, I really want to give you a little more...

Goodbye

I wanted to put this up so I could say goodbye to everyone that I chatted with, like Gwen or MEG... So, yea, see you next year after Friday.

Terrorist

What's the difference between a woman with a penis and a terrorist? You can negotiate with the terrorist.

Gun

What is the difference between a bag of chips and a gun?

If you pull one of them suddenly, everybody wants to be your friend.

Man

Sorry man, but I got to say one thing. You know when a bully in a movie walks to you, then they walk up to you, and they smell you and say, "What are you doing?"

Friend

Friend (Evan): Did you do some dumb shit?

Me: Hell yeah.

Friend (Evan): Did you get us both in trouble?

Me: Hell yeah.

Friend (Evan): Will I still help you because you are my best friend?

Both: FUCK YEAH!

Excuse

(On their 1-2 loss to Watford) Ty: Well, we mustn't forget that it's been raining so...

Robbie: It's been raining???

Ty: Yeah!

Robbie: Are you being serious??? It's raining for both teams!

Candace

Kid 1: Do you know Candace?

Kid 2: Candace who?

Kid 1: Candace dick fit in your mouth!

Egg

What has to be broken before you can use it?

Answer: An egg.

Twin

What do you tell twins who are in love with each other?

Go fuck yourself!

Bid

What do you call the worst feeling ever?

Drinking Big before Mini. :)