You jokes
What do you call a fast Panera Bread?
Panera Sped.
How are baseball and an orphan different?
A baseball game you can do a home run.
Roses are red, Violets are blue, I need your peach, and I'll torture you with a speech.
What do you call a Chinese man with one leg?
TY-WON-SHO
(Tie one shoe)
What do you call a very long bowl?
Manute Bowl.
Memes
Timmy Turner: I wish the Vegan Teacher was a cheeseburger.
Wanda: Ok, Timmy.
Timmy: Cosmo, bring her to me!
Cosmo: Here you go, Timmy.
*Timmy eats Miss Kadie*
When you see your mom.
Me: bruh
Her: Are you serious right now bro?
Me: Yeah no shit.
Her: *slaps me*
Well, you know what they say, time flies when you're just a ball of anxiety and stress. :D
Why do blind kids like plane crashes?
Because you can’t dislike what you have never seen.
What do you call a Muslim bee?
Habibee.
What do you call a person that [proudly] knows only one language? A bloody seppo.
What do you call a person that speaks five languages? A Euro waiter.
When Leicester City won the league in 2015/16, do you think there was a little lad in Africa running around with "Drinkwater" on his back, annoying the hell out of the locals?
Hey, I met you like way way back, just like your hairline.
What do you call a dog magician?
A labracadabrador.
Your hairline is so far back my grandpa saw it before you!
If I died and went to heaven, do you think I’d be friends with Prince?
The only thing that makes me want to stay alive more is the thought that Prince would hate me.
Fat bully. That was just the starter, now do you want the main course?
Me: I don't think I want that because you already ate it.
Why do orphans like tigers? I don't know, you tell me.
If you make a joke about me, I'll tell my mom.
My enemy likes to act like he’s stupid sometimes, and so once he asked me what a sin was, and I responded with, “you.”