You jokes
What do you call a nut stuck to a wall?
A walnut.
What do you call a nut who loves the game of chess?
A chess-nut.
You must be rich! You've got all the cashews.
You pecan do it!
Do you like my a-corn-y jokes?
I’m part of the anti anime association, but I’m starting to like anime. What do I do?
And for the joke: What do you call a dog with no back legs and a pair of metal balls? Sparky.
What do you call New York City?
A human zoo.
You're like a cat, all you do is eat and sleep.
This is how to die soft 101.
Yo bro, you good? You need a hug?
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.
What do you call a dog with no legs? No point in calling, he won't come anyway :(
My jokes are like your dad, you only see them for a few days.
What's braver than coming out gay? Taking a shit in an elementary school bathroom with those two kids that always mess with you and turn off the lights.
Are you an abstract manifestation of my childhood traumas and recent memories combined? 'Cause damn, you look like you came out of a dream!
Hey guys! I'm back! Sorry I didn't post yesterday! I had swim practice, and a bunch of homework, but here I am! And here is the quote of the day!
"Push yourself, because no one will do it for you."
Love y'all so much!
New Windex ad:
You should get Windex for that dirty mind!
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Terrier.
Terrier who?
Your Halloween decorations are terri-fying!
A man has been dating a girl forever. He finally says, "I love you." The girl says, "Aww, thanks." The man looks at her, "Are you not gonna say it back?" The girl says, "No, I can’t."
When your mom says it will all be ok if you just......... *there is blood on the floor*
My best opinion: when life goes to hell, you just go down with it.
When you say, "I wish I could cut off these bumps on my neck." (Your mom walking to you with a knife.)