How do you stop a terrorist from drowning?
Take your foot off his head.
You Jokes
There was a kid sitting in a corner.
Me: "Hey! Why are you here at an orphanage?"
Orphan: "..."
Me: "Oh, wait, you're an orphan."
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
QoS.
QoS who?
QoS there me me who me and you.
Why did they put the Petronas towers? Eh, you do you.
You know, it takes a lot of balls to successfully compete in women’s sports as a man.
Your hairline is so bad people thought you were Vegeta!
Maybe if you get a better hairline, your dad will come back with the milk.
Did you hear about that one guy who dipped his balls in paint?
My friend said they were “Pretty nuts!”
Q: What do you call a blonde with two brain cells?
A: Pregnant.
You're so clapped that you make Susan Boyle attractive.
"I miss you.
Being happy was never that hard without you..."
Someone's dad: You think he/she wants to join me? I didn't get the milk...
What do you call a dark, average height Punjabi male?
Josiah.
Why couldn't your mom make you dinner? Because she's dead!
Making a comforting breakfast.
But you have a knife.
What do you call a man who loves Adidas and Puma and drives a Volkswagen? Potential Nazi.
What do you call someone with notorious special needs and an extra chromosome?
The double trouble.
Is your home the Twin Towers? Because I'm tryna crash!
Two people stood in one room. The first guy stared at the second.
First guy: “Sorry I had to punch you. It was a game, bro.”
Second guy: “Between me and you talking, there’s almost no PUNCH line. Hah!”
Did you know penguins can fly if you throw them hard enough? Just like children!
What do you call a teacher who never farts in public? A private tutor.