You jokes
The teacher asked the class what they wanted to be when they grew up.
Johnny said when he grows up he's going to be a motherfucking hustler. He's going to have a wife and live in a big house in the country with maids and butlers and drive a Rolls-Royce, and he's also going to have an apartment in the city where his side bitch is going to live. He's going to buy her expensive jewelry, whatever she wants: cars, diamonds, clothes, shoes.
The teacher didn't know what to say, so she calls on Sally. "What do you want to be when you grow up?"
Sally said, "I want to be Johnny's bitch."
Friend, you're bold and fat.
Me: Bro, go to the bathroom and look at the mirror. You will probably break it.
Your mum is stupid, just like you.
Yo mama so fat, One Punch Man had to punch 3 times.
Talking about planets with my nephew.
He asked if you could plow thru Uranus because it's all gas.
Having sex in the woods and a deer walks up and fucks you from the back.
"Do you know the Annoying Orange?"
"Yeah, they elected him before Biden!"
Your forehead is so big that Mastermind thought you were his long lost brother!
"Did it hurt when you fell from Heaven? You're adopted. Haley says she likes me more than you."
Why is basketball called basketball?
Because you play with a basket.
Spell "I C U P." I see you pee.
Spell "I cup."
I see you pee.
What do you call a kid with special needs with a gun? Special Forces.
The best part about being a medical student is, you will never run out of jokes.
How do you stop a school shooter from killing you?
Tell him you don’t believe in dog.
Did you hear about the exciting new drug they developed for lesbians with depression? They call it: TRICOXAGIN.
You know why morning food digests so quickly.
Because it breaks fast.
Imagine getting rickrolled. Oh, I forgot, you already got rickrolled yesterday.
What do you call the whole population turning into emos?
The Great Depression.
I cry when you leave the room. They're tears of joy because you have an ugly hairline.